BACKWARDS WISDOM

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards...
Soren Kierkegaard

A truer statement was never said. It is such a shame that it sometimes takes a lifetime to stifle the urge to walk blindly forward while looking back over your shoulder. Memories can be carried along safely. Past lessons are important to future happiness so must be filed away for later research. The study of the past is history and it benefits a persons life to fully understand all the stages passed through on the way to any present day phase.

Study it in quiet moments. Recall it in as healthy a fashion as possible. Analyze it to its fullest if that is your inclination... just do not allow it to steal your present, or poison your future. You can be a scholar on the subject of what makes you tick without standing stationary. Looking backward will not make the images any sharper... what is gone is truly gone. All you will really see if you gaze down that long road is piles of debris scattered all around.

It is a bit like watching an episode of Hoarders. You know there is a house there somewhere but it is so littered you cannot define its dimensions. Chaos of such monumental proportions comes from agony that was never validated or dealt with. Now that is a picture perfect example of what happens when we stop at the moment of impact and never move forward. Life piles up all around and we huddle mostly alone.

I do not advocate forward movement as in simply following the crowd. It may all seem like fun and games until you end up somewhere you would not have willingly visited. Even if you are not certain of your final destination you should always be committed to a direction of your own choosing. We each have a path of our own to tread. Others can and should stroll along with us, but we should also be quite comfortable walking solo when need be. A higher power will always have us in sight.

Keeping alert to all our surroundings will keep us safe from stepping off any cliffs. We have all watched people who were looking backward run into things that were clearly visible directly ahead of them. Hell I have even stepped off a few curbs and crashed into a number of things myself. Head up, eyes forward, and debris free is the only sane way to travel. Think about it... let it ride... then decide!!!  

    

TENDING FORGIVENESS

TODAY'S QUOTE:
How does one know if she has forgiven? You tend to feel sorrow over the circumstance instead of rage, you tend to feel sorry for the person rather than angry with him. You tend to have nothing left to say about it all... Clarissa Pinkola Estes

The fact is you will do all those things and more. There can be no real peace without real pardons being passed all around. Some to offenders who never meant to offend. Some to people who wounded you on purpose and found joy from your pain. Some to ones who deserve to be forgiven. Some to others who deserve nothing except the bad karma they earned. Some to yourself for failures in judgement, sins of both the intentional and the unintentional sort, or simply occasions when you were a hot mess without the good sense God gave you.

Alexander Pope said, "To err is human, to forgive is divine" and no truer words were ever spoken. One definition of divine is, being or having the nature of a God. We are made with the power of forgiveness at our fingertips. We may learn through life to hold a grudge, but any lesson learned can be unlearned when we learn better. I like to think He grades on the curve when we show we are trying. And I firmly believe He will judge me as I judge others... so not forgiving would be a poor investment in my souls future. We do not earn any points for just forgiving the smallest offenses or the sweetest offenders. If you cannot pardon all, you just might as well not pardon anyone.

Forgiveness is strong medicine for heartaches and soul sickness. We do not have to become best friends. We do not have to forget either, but I have found that once forgiven the need to dwell evaporates. If I refuse to rent any space inside my heart for a grudge then my mind resents them taking up any space there. I place the pain of their offence in Gods hands and their punishment in karmas lap. I have too much to do. I cannot waste the time and effort it takes to lug a grudge around. I cannot accomplish anything positive with a heart full of negatives. And I cannot reach for the divine with dirty hands. Think about it... let it ride... then decide!!!    

TRUE WISDOM AND POWER

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power. - Author Unknown

Most of this quote I agree with, but a small portion makes me a bit uneasy. I figure the author must have meant the mastering of others in the gentlest of fashion. I will have to miss out on any strength gained from being master of anyone besides myself. I suppose that once a person has suffered from being meanly mastered by another human being they just naturally shy away from that role. The shadow left by heavy hands may be covering a deeper meaning. If you, "get" that portion feel free to explore it with me here.

The mastering of self is very powerful and very possible. You cannot ease into it like you would slide behind the wheel of a car. It is tough love at its finest. The power to control our thoughts, feelings, and actions evolves in just that order. First you gain control of your mind and what enters there. Thoughts need to be managed... negatives ejected... depth increased... shallow notions take up too much space and reward us no grace. Spite and revenge steal all chance of understanding and peace. Once we have true control of our mind then managing our feelings is possible.

Emotions are like selfish children. When we allow them control then drama is certain. We often give in to them and end up acting out in ways totally foreign to our nature. There is nothing quite as destructive as a child throwing a fit. Let the child have control and the adult will have to clean up a mess they never intended to make.

I am not suggesting not to feel. I am saying to grow in understanding of why you feel... acknowledge the pain... validate the emotion, but do so with forethought. Never be satisfied to simply be controlled by a knee-jerk reaction to any negative emotion. Do not fight against the pain; some things are meant to be painful. Feel it, but do not become it. Do not build a monument at its base. Do not worship it by becoming its victim. With enough practice at controlling your thoughts and emotions then your actions will just naturally follow a saner pattern.  

There is true wisdom gained from self-knowledge. The better you know what makes you tick the more you empathize with others. And empathy is such a wondrous thing... almost magical in its ability to join souls together. We should all take time each day for some internal exploration. We have enough time to spare if it is of enough importance. We waste so much time trying to find peace from other people or joy from ownership of things. Why bother looking elsewhere for something that you can only find inside yourself? Think about it... let it ride... then decide!!!

HIGH SIGHT

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Never bend your head. Hold it high. Look the world straight in the eye. - Helen Keller

The fact that this quote was made by a woman who could not see is a wonderful irony. Helen Keller may not have had sight, but she viewed the world and its inhabitants more clearly than most people ever do. She could not hear any sound outside of herself, so she learned early on to listen to her heart. Her view of obstacles as challenges, her hunger to learn, and her trust in the positive people who believed in her hidden brilliance made failure impossible.

Her whole life was a glorious struggle, but she never backed down from a battle. If she had she would never have even known her own name and others would have no occasion to remember it. The summer of my 12th year I read, "The Miracle Worker" from cover to cover. That inspired my love of reading, but it also taught me that no matter what you face in life it is attitude more than aptitude that really matters.  

Her advice is spot on and timeless. Facing the world eye-to-eye demands a heads up posture. When we keep our eyes on the ground and our head bowed we adopt a victims stance. The world is overflowing with people who will be all too glad to use our own stance against us to gain control. If our own posture can cause such damage it only makes sense to walk as tall and proud as possible.

I used to be an eyes on the ground person, and I paid a heavy price. I was by nature and nurture quite overcome by mean natured people who where the ones who professed to love me the most. It took almost a lifetime to lift my head up. In a way I was both blind and deaf, but all obstacles were mountains I carried on my back.

All it took to get free of it all was one blinding moment of clarity. I thought... "40 more yrs of this... then the nursing home... then the cemetery." After that I had no choice but to raise my head, straighten my back, and demand my due. If Helen could overcome... if I could overcome... then anyone can. Think about it... let it ride... then decide!!!   

OUR OWN RECKONING

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"And, above all things, never think that you're not good enough yourself. A man should never think that. My belief is that in life people will take you very much at your own reckoning." - Anthony Trollope

Having positive thoughts about yourself does not make you an egomaniac. One is a direct avenue toward growth, while the other is an abnormal certainty of perfection. Thinking too little of yourself is just as harmful. Everything in life is harder if you imagine yourself too lame for success. We program the view seen by how we look at our own image. Self portraits are rarely as accurate as they may seem.

Most of us are smarter, more capable, and better looking than we view ourselves as being. We lack confidence more often than we lack ability. And we censure ourselves more harshly than we ever would anyone else. We wear negatives on our face never realizing how beautiful we are when we smile. Our expectations may be too lofty, when our stamina is too low... guaranteeing failure. A healthy balance between the two is possible if you simply readjust the way you view yourself.

Fear of success is real too. The cost of getting to the top is great, but the price of staying there is often more than we bargain for. The monster you know seems safer than the one you do not... life is funny like that. But the least we can do is  too do all we can to be within reach of that threshold. Crossing it may never happen, but knowing you could validates all doubts suffered for its sake. Fairly earn a good opinion of yourself then pass it on. Have faith, exercise it with grace, and others will view you with pleasure.   

What other people label you with before you are aware of who you really are is useless information, better left behind. The weak and mean spirited love to stand on others to increase their height. What they think of you can never matter, since they cannot even like themselves. Do not bother trying to alter their view... but waste no time before you begin altering your own. Think about it... Let it ride... then decide!!! 

TWO THINGS

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Two things are bad for the heart -- running up stairs and running down people. - Bernard M. Baruch

My running days are mostly over, unless my life depends on its resurrection. Even then it would only briefly delay the inevitable since my accelerator is stuck firmly somewhere between slow and stop. I am at an age when falling down stairs is much more possible than running up then ever was. Tripping up them is still well within my ability. I realize that is nothing to brag about... and neither is running down a fellow traveler.

People may lose the stamina for the physical portion of this quote with age and illness. But the ability to run people down never ends as long as speaking is still possible. If we cannot lift each other up it makes more sense to just leave one another alone. The need to interact with someone we do not approve of is often a part of our job. The ability to do it well without creating drama is invaluable. We have no right to voice our opinion to them about what we view as their shortcomings. And we have no right to pass our venom along to others.

If I wanted to walk daily and the path of my choice was overrun by pests I would select an alternate route. Same with people. We cannot like everyone... and everyone does not like us... it makes neither of us better people to listen to or repeat negatives. I think God was pretty serious when he pointed out that the fashion with which we judge our fellow man is the pattern that will be used to judge us.

Good karma is what I want to earn; positive inspiration is what I deal in... first to myself then onto others. Gossip has no place in my life. My ears refuse to hear it and my mouth refuses to repeat it. None of us gets through life without doing a multitude of things that could be used against us. It makes good sense to alter our behavior when it gets too close to gossip worthy. And it makes no sense at all to point out the shortcomings of anyone else while we are still tripping upon our own. Remember that God hears our nasty whispering about others, and if he were to use our scale on us when the time comes we may be a bit too heavy for angel wings. Think about it... let it ride... then decide!!!     

SHOP LOCAL

TODAY'S QUOTE:
We choose and consume, feast and forget, then rush on to the next hot thing. There's no point chasing that kind of success because it's so transient. Far better to follow (our) own paths and be true to (ourselves)." ~ Emili Sandé

The world runs on consumption of goods... the more you have the more you want. We self-soothe, measure self-worth, calculate the value of others, and equate a good life by how many goods owned. We chase a happiness that does not exist in possessions that we grow bored with when anything bigger, faster, or better comes along. Having things is not a crime, but letting them have you ought to be classified as one.

Things of real and lasting value do not cost any green paper that they make in a factory. Real happiness cannot be manufactured, but it can be grown. We can rush back and forth filling shopping carts in a frantic dance to music that plays in the endless advertisements that promise us heaven on earth. But the only way to find what we seek is to stand still and firm inside ourselves and find out what we can produce. Shop local!!! Think about it... let it ride... then decide!!! 

WHAT LIES WITHIN

TODAY'S QUOTE:
What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Sometimes it takes a lifetime to realize how complex we really are. Some people never explore what lies beneath their basic layer. They just coast along, satisfied to skim across the surface unaware of the treasures buried all around. The unlimited possibilities get overshadowed by their daily humdrum same old, same old routine.

I spent half my lifetime shadow walking. My reasons for being clueless had to do with self-preservation, but the life I was preserving was just a hollow cave dug by a shallow jailer. I do not bother mourning the time lost... I am much too busy gathering treasures. Our reasons for not exploring ourselves are numerous, but whatever the cause the result is always the same. Without focus we bobble-head through life, never landing long enough in one position to make sense of much of anything of real importance. 

Some obsess over their appearance as if that were all they are made of. A pretty face or beautiful body holds them captive in front of a mirror in a kind of twisted worship. They focus on hair and nails, or brawn and buff as if the packaging of a soul was any kind of indicator of its content. Shallow minds by nature just bury deeper the only portion of a human that gets more beautiful with age and wisdom earned. The glory days for an ego maniac end when their looks fade... the glory days for a soul are eternal.  

Digging takes strength and requires a fair amount of time to reach a place where sense can be made of yourself. The what, when, how, and whys of a lifetime compose an equation that is meant to be solved. Without closure of past issues we are doomed to march between tasks like worker ants never knowing there is more to life than the endless to and fro. The entire world may be open to exploration, but the vast majority of us are limited travelers of our outer surroundings and even more stunted with our internal space. Even a short road trip taken soul deep will add more depth and knowledge to your life than months out on the open road. Think about it.... let it ride... then decide!!!   

A FLEXIBLE APPROACH

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Stay committed to your decisions, but stay flexible in your approach. - Tom Robbins

There are a variety of avenues open to us for reaching every destination we seek to visit. Some are more difficult, yet much shorter... some are more scenic, but add miles to our journey. How we approach is always a choice made by us in accordance with the importance we place in certain variables. We may be in a hurry, or we may have all the time in the world. We may be in the drivers seat or we may simply be a passenger... either way the choice to travel at all belongs to us.

Decisions made have the same scope of variables to consider. Once we adopt a stance we have chosen a destination. All that is left to do is choose the approach that will gain us the most distance with the least of amount of damage to ourselves and too others. If the decision leads to our certain happiness but may inflict pain on someone else it is only proper to do everything possible to ease their burden as much as we can, without abandoning our own happiness.

We may be willing to go the shorter, more difficult path, but if we are not traveling solo it might be necessary to take the scenic route. The passenger that we were certain would be happy to ride along may jump ship; the only certainty in life is its uncertainty. Our decisions may be rock-solid, while everything around us is fluid. Flexibility and patience are mandatory to give others time to adjust to our readjustment. Gentle is always better, although it is not always possible; personal growth occurs at its own timetable and hard decisions only get harder and more desperate with wasted time. With a destination certain all that is left to do is choose the mode of transportation and the path that best suits your soul. Think about it... let it ride... then decide!!!

THOUGHT QUALITY

TODAY'S POST:
The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts.
Marcus Aelius Aurelius

There can be no true happiness as long as unruly notions and whinny what ifs are allowed to rule inside a brain that has been overfed on negatives. The same way bad eating habits make a mess of a body, bad thinking habits can wad up even the roomiest brain. It is easy to forget who rules what goes on in there when the door has been left wide open, allowing entry to every type of visitor. If every person on earth is not equally admissible inside your home why is every single thought made welcome? An open door policy for a mind is a dangerous way to operate a ruling portion of any human being.

Our homes have doors and windows have screens to keep out unwanted people, varmints, and insects. When we camp our tents are kept secured from uninvited visitors as well. Any insect inside a dwelling is either part of a deliberate collection or an enemy which we quickly hunt down and evict. We may gently assist it back outdoors... it may end up deader than a doornail... point being either way gone is gone. Likewise any animal is  either a pet or an invader; the difference is easy to identify. If it makes you smile it is a pet. If it makes you scream and run outside it is an invader. We do not waste any time or spare any expense to rid our home of uninvited animals.

Why we do not protect our mind in the same fashion is a real puzzler. Wandering thoughts seem to have a preference for seeking out trouble of some kind. Worry is one of their favorite destinations, where they quickly get lost between past regrets and future fears. The noise and confusion of a tangled mass of negative notions quickly drowns out the gentle positives scattered all around. Protect your mind the same way you do your home. Screen out pests, man the door so you can redirect or ignore the uninvited, and if something finds its way past all your safeguards do whatever you must to reclaim what is yours. Think about it... let it ride... then decide!!!