COTTON CANDY PROMISES

Today's Quote:
It is better to offer no excuse than a bad one. – George Washington, 1732-1799, 1st President of the United States

It would be wonderful if we could get through life without doing anything that needs to be excused. But no matter how we try that just isn't possible. The best that we can hope for is that the measure of our offences stays below our ability to make them right somehow. Excuses mean less and less the more often they are tendered. It's always better to change a behavior than alter our alibis.

Taking responsibility demands facing our faults, swallowing misplaced pride, shrinking a puffed up ego, and thinking of what can be done to avoid repeating the offence. That's hard work. It's much easier to think up clever ways to arrange words to earn a pardon. Words as sweet as cotton candy may be ingested by a hopeful listener, and forgiveness fully granted. If momentary relief is all you're after words are the way to go.

But be warned... even the most hopeful listener soon tires of lame excuses, no matter how nicely arranged. Their ears may have been  sugar coated, but trust me their eyes were waiting for the actions that matched the phrases. Cotton candy promises are fine and dandy... words spun like sugar, can ease a hungry soul. But eaten alone, without any action to follow... will leave a disappointed spirit starved and hollow.

I'm not suggesting that if you have sweet words to not use them. But if words are all you possess then save them. I'd be able to add years to my life if I could gather up all the time I wasted swallowing cotton candy pledges. When actions finally came from my main tormentor he didn't say anything. No excuses were given, no promises made... he simply changed the behavior and set us both free.

Even the best alibi weavers can see when their audience is less than convinced. He knew he was one broken promise away from being homeless. I was done being punished for believing. He finally "got it"!!!!!!!!!!!!

I can't say that I haven't eaten any cotton candy since then, but I can say that it will never become my primary diet again. Rose colored glasses cannot ever become a refuge... it is what it is... change it... accept it... or fuck it. Try when you can to make more amends than excuses. When words escape you, do something to say more than any words could. And as always... think about it... let it ride... then decide!!!